KI #3: Speaking With Conviction

On the six steps to overcoming anxiety and communicating effectively

---

At the University of South Carolina, SPCH 140 Public Communication is often a cakewalk. To some. For me, not so much. Much to the chagrin of nearly every computing major I’ve spoken to, this class is a gift and a curse. The good news– no matter your confidence level, the assignments and feedback from this course will find a weak spot. This is great for building upon your speech and presentation skills. The bad news– no matter your confidence level, the assignments and feedback from this course will find a weak spot. This is terrible for introverts and their self-esteem. I didn’t realize I had speech anxiety until a few weeks into this course my freshman year. During the infamous Covid year, my motivation and burnout levels fluctuated frequently throughout the spring semester. This was a contributing factor to my failure in the class, and allowed room for doubt and negative feelings towards presenting. Ignoring the festering internal confidence problem was a mistake.

My first year of SPCH 140 was decent for the most part, until the midpoint in the semester. Come our first persuasive speech of the course, we were tasked with choosing a policy and persuading the audience on something that deserved attention. I chose the similarities between living in Columbia South Carolina versus my time living in Bahrain during high school, even though lifestyles among the two countries seemed contradictory. I felt I could deliver, as I had in fact experiencing living in both countries. However, the scope of this speech was too broad. On top of the large piece of policy I had bitten too much of, I struggled as I sat and wrote out my main points. Seeing as this speech was anecdotal, finding concrete statistics and quantitative data to quote was an arduous task. Most of it was subjective, tying into a person’s positionality. I fully fleshed out the three weak main points I had, wrote an introduction and closing paragraph, and hoped for the best.

The next day, it was time to present. As I was called up, I didn’t feel the slightest bit nervous. For this speech I did not rely on visual aids, so all eyes were on me. I read out from my notecard, detailing the intro, glossing over the main points and trying to convince the audience of the similarities. However, the night before I had heavily relied on improvisation to make the transitions flow and elaborate on main point details. By this point, I had read through my entire notecard. For this speech, I had written out the main points, but not the entire speech like beforehand. All I had in front of me was about a minute's worth of speaking, none of more than superficial facts and main points outlining the speech. As my brain struggled to catch up with the sudden lack of track to run on, I couldn’t help but freeze, eyes scanning the notecard for more script to read. I blanked and had nothing more to say. Feeling unprepared for a class is bad enough. Feeling unprepared for a speech you're giving is even worse. But feeling unprepared for a speech you are actively giving, while your instructor is grading you and the entire class of twenty stares at you? The absolute worst. My speech anxiety before this moment was mild, but after that my heart would regularly race at even the thought of having to speak to a forum. This crippled my self-esteem and ability to see myself as a confident speaker for years.

Luckily, the University allows you to retake classes you did not pass. Little did I know that two years later, I would be taking SPCH 140 again. This year, I had the magnificent Dr. Rachel Mann. Not only was she a positive influence, but her homework and extra credit style helped build confidence– recording yourself delivering your speech, watching it back and writing a one-pager on what you could stand to improve. Already, this was an approach that would have helped destress last time.

I especially felt comfortable when Dr. Mann told me that we would discuss speech anxiety in class. Sure enough, the next class was a lecture on ways to deal with speech anxiety and what to do to be a successful speaker. From Dr. Mann’s lecture, I extracted six essential steps to overcoming speech anxiety.

1. Acknowledge your fears.
2. Act “as if”
3. Work carefully on your introduction.
4. Practice, practice, practice
5. Make sure to breathe
6. Visualize yourself as a successful speaker

Acknowledging your fears, the first of the steps is the most crucial. We cannot make the appropriate changes to something we refuse to acknowledge. I spent a lot of time imagining the worst case scenario, and what could go wrong. Freshman Ali’s mistake was that he did not take further initiative beyond worrying. Now, I am more judicious in acknowledging my fears. Yes, I acknowledge that the worst case is a feasible outcome, but I must also acknowledge that the best case is too.

Next, you must act “as if.” In other words, act confident even if you don’t feel confident. Maintaining the illusion of control is paramount in public speaking forums. Maddy Perez from HBO’s Euphoria once said “90% of life is confidence, and the thing about confidence is that no one knows if it's real or not.”

Working carefully on your introduction is pretty straightforward. The most nerve-racking part of a speech is starting off. This is when the heart palpitations are the worst. Getting familiar with your introduction is not enough. Practicing your intro to the point where it is memorized and readily recitable greatly helps overcome the nerves. Successfully transitioning from the intro to your first main point is half the battle in overcoming speech anxiety.

The key to success in public speaking is a combination of the next two steps, practicing over and over, and remembering to breathe. My freshman year speech failure was a direct result of not practicing enough, leading to me feeling unsure of myself and the material I had written. Always practice your speech at least three times, though I would personally advise five times to be the sweet spot. Breathing is important in acting “as if”. Rushing through a speech and speaking faster than your body can handle does not make a speaker appear composed and credible. Taking natural pauses and allowing yourself to inhale mitigates stress you may face on the speakers stage.

Lastly, visualization. Had I heard this advice my freshman year, I would’ve been confused on how visualizing myself as a good speaker would manifest into confidence and success in public speaking. Now, I understand that it is about perception. Me not thinking much of nor being able to see myself as a confident speaker in my head caused my failure. Had I done the work to picture myself as someone who could speak with conviction, maybe my nerves wouldn’t have been so bad in the first place.

Rinsing and repeating the six steps for each speech contributed to significant growth over the semester. The most successful of my speeches was our final presentation, a second persuasive speech. Unlike the four speeches I’d previously given this semester, I was actually excited to speak. Selecting ethics in the justice system using recording artists lyrics as admissible court evidence, I scoured the internet for relevant cases and found the heartbreaking case of rising rap-star McKinley Phipps. For more information on the speech, refer to my artifact section below. Working to align my speech with my visual aid, there was little time that week where I wasn’t practicing my delivery. This speech was the last thing standing between me and an A in SPCH140, a class I had failed this time two years ago. I was determined to make it my best.

Come presentation day, my nerves were unwilling to subside. However, I was able to compartmentalize and focus on what was really important– getting my message across, and convincing the audience that taking a recording artist's art and subpoenaing as evidence was an injustice. Especially since these prosecutions solely targeted rap artists, a predominantly black demographic. While my nerves made it hard to feel anything but anxious about getting up and presenting, I knew I had to do this subject justice. A poor delivery would only be to the detriment of the audience, who would miss out on shocking statistics about a problem they likely didn’t know existed. As my name was called, my heart raced, but I acted “as if.” Of everyone before me, I was the expert on the subject. They trusted me as a credible speaker, as all students are to do their due diligence and provide accurate and truthful information in public speaking. I took a few deep breaths in, reminding myself that I had practiced the speech and its intro too many times to count, and took it from the top, loudly projecting and speaking with conviction. I’m pleased to say I have since aced that speech and the class. This has done wonders for my confidence in myself, and my ability to speak publicly.

During my security analyst internship, as previously described in Key Insight #1, a good portion of the work done required strong soft skills, like being effective at written and oral communication– occasionally requiring interns to present. Hearing that I was tasked with presenting an after action report on the phishing campaign me and my workfellow had created, tested and launched, my immediate reaction was dread. Despite knowing the Microsoft Attack Simulator inside and out, neatly visualizing the cost analysis data and being the subject matter expert (SME) on this campaign, my wavering confidence made it seem impossible to deliver a coherent speech.

Refusing to settle for a middling performance, I changed my mindset. This time, I was going to deliver a great presentation that would not leave me feeling abashed. Luckily, I had my workfellow with me as we stood in front of our stomping ground, the security operations center. She allowed me to lead. The nerves kicked in, and I partially felt unsure of myself, not having the opportunity to practice our presentation by myself nor with Kyra. This was completely spontaneous. I put my anxiety aside, and focused on what I knew– the entire system I was presenting! Though my introduction was not as strong as it could have been, by our conclusion of walking the interns through what we had created and how, I was beaming with pride. I had come out victorious from another public speaking scenario that would have previously left me on edge. There is still a lot of work to be done to improve my public speaking, but the fact that I could do it is what inspires me the most.

Since then, I apply these six steps where it's applicable. In anxiety-inducing interview settings. Practicing your introduction, acting confident, breathing and visualizing yourself as a successful interviewee and the best candidate have all helped me alleviate my interview anxiety. In professional networking settings. Having a recitable elevator pitch, acting confidently, breathing and visualizing yourself as a confident professional will trump your nerves. No matter the social setting where anxiety is a factor, at least two of these steps are applicable to reducing and overcoming stress. What shocked me is the newfound appreciation I have for public speaking. After the class came to an end, I found myself yearning to do it again, to continue building upon the skills I’d learned and continue crushing my anxiety. Unfortunately, I still find myself apprehensive in approaching certain social settings, especially in a professional context. But, by practicing the skill set Dr. Mann gave to her students, I now see myself as a strong orator and someone with excellent communication skills. Whether or not that confidence is fake, is anybody's guess!